In August, I was terminated from my job. Within 48 hours, I was told by my landlord that they decided to sell the house and I had less than 30 days to find a new place to live. Because of my son’s health problems, I had previously exhausted my funds helping him and his family. I had $300 in my account and no idea what I was going to do.
But for the first time since I was saved in 1990, I pushed aside those frantic feelings and decided to trust God. I refused to move until God showed me where to go.
I was invited to the Changed Women's Retreat and was even awarded a half scholarship to attend camp. I thought, "Is this a joke, God? I only have $300!" But I took a step of faith and registered. It was worth every penny.
In my first quiet time, I let some things lay low--not fall off, just lay low. As I prayed, I was surrounded in His protection and strength. I was raised with a rough background. It wasn’t until camp that I realized what love was. I’m 50 and I have never experienced love as I did at camp. Real, true, unconditional protection and intimacy for the first time. I know it’s always been there, and I finally accepted it. I love water, and if that had been an ocean of love, I was deep in it and I had no desire to leave.
Later when I was in the prayer room, I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. I didn’t see the woman’s face--she had already turned to walk away. In my writing, God had called me Beloved. I looked and the card she left for me was addressed to My Beloved. I don’t know who wrote this note, but it was all by the Holy Spirit. It was just so beautiful and exactly what I needed.
Going through this storm is hard, challenging, and scary--but His peace is all around me and there’s no worry. I’ve never been so receptive to Him. I’m not in a hurry. I'm taking it minute by minute, and I’m listening.
Before, the silence made me crazy and nauseous--all the negative thoughts circling around me. I wanted distractions. But now I know that the Holy Spirit just wants to be with me, in the quiet.